Far Cough 9:28 Thu Oct 30
Ten Rules of Football as a kid
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Ten Rules of Football as a kid
1. The Fattest one is always the goalkeeper
2. The person who's ball it is decides who plays
3. Penalties are only awarded if the "injured" player swears a lot
4. The match only ends when everyone is tired
5. No matter how many you are winning by, the winner is always determined by "next goal wins"
6. No referee
7. If nobody has a football, a plastic bottle will do
8. If you are picked last, you have no hope in life
9. Getting a football stuck under a car is the most stressful part of life
10. When the owner of the ball gets pissed off, it's game over
Jumpers for goalposts for sure
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Replies - Newest Posts First ( Show In Chronological Order)
DaillyShaggedMyWife
2:47 Fri Oct 31
Re: Ten Rules of Football as a kid
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For number 7, a tennis ball is also applicable
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Academy321
1:58 Fri Oct 31
Re: Ten Rules of Football as a kid
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If it's jumpers for goalposts and it hits the inside of the jumper then it's post and in and a Goal
Unless the biggest kid says it's not
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Boris the Beard
1:57 Fri Oct 31
Re: Ten Rules of Football as a kid
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Man on = Car coming
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goose
1:11 Fri Oct 31
Re: Ten Rules of Football as a kid
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thats the one.
i scored for my team, ran to the corner flag and gave it my best Roger Milla............. as a jogged back for kick-off my mum shouted at me across the pitch asking me what i thought i was playing at!! cringe.
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Far Cough
1:07 Fri Oct 31
Re: Ten Rules of Football as a kid
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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gaAq2LcbKPY
Roger Milla goal celebration
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goose
1:07 Fri Oct 31
Re: Ten Rules of Football as a kid
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Roger Milla circa Italia '90 ................ loved a little dance by the corner flag. sort of a wiggle - hard to describe.
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Lewisham_Hammer
1:05 Fri Oct 31
Re: Ten Rules of Football as a kid
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It's funny me and my friends always called Headers and Volleys "66". If you were in goal you used to start counting faster and 60 - 66 was over in 2 seconds.
I know '3 and in' was also sometimes called FA Cup/World Cup knocokouts (depending on time of year).
goose what was the Roger Milla celebration, I've forgotten?
I also remember finding a playing field with goal posts AND nets was like finding the holy grail!
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balders
1:04 Fri Oct 31
Re: Ten Rules of Football as a kid
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Wembley had to be the greatest street game ever invented
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Grumpster
12:37 Fri Oct 31
Re: Ten Rules of Football as a kid
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Headers and Volleys was a nightmare if not using a proper goal though, as whoever fucked up to give the keeper the win had to go in goal and they would always argue that the ball was never too high and would have gone under the bar if there was one.
Loved it.
Oh to be young again, life was simpler and Sundays were fantastic breaking in to schools to use their erected posts.
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joey5000
11:33 Fri Oct 31
Re: Ten Rules of Football as a kid
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Headers and volleys were always good fun.
Having to go in goal if the current keeper managed to catch your shot.
And the player who touches it last when the keeper counts down to 0 has to go in goal. Always a pain when the keeper gets down to the last 5 or so seconds and you bang a cracking cross in and your mates stitch you up and leave it!
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goose
11:23 Fri Oct 31
Re: Ten Rules of Football as a kid
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i was always a fan of the Roger Milla celebration.
did it after scoring for my sunday side and my mum had a right go at me.
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Lewisham_Hammer
11:18 Fri Oct 31
Re: Ten Rules of Football as a kid
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Monkey Rush goalkeeper - Same as a rush keeper where they could be on pitch too but you could swap with anyone at any time by shouting "change". Queue a goalmouth scramble with random people in your team shouting "change" every time a shot was lined up in your direction and if you forgot to shout it the other team went mental and got a penalty.
Jumpers for goalposts - if the ball went over a jumper everyone would run to the jumper pick it up and the opposing team if they felt it wasn't a goal would all cross their hands over waving side to side to say no goal.
When playing at lunch at school and the bell goes you'd keep playing till you got shouted at to stop.
Doing an 'amazing move' or scoring an 'amazing' goal then beaming with pride and feeling like you were actually good enough to play in the premier league and it was only a matter of time before a scout showed up and discovered you.
Scoring a blinder then running off doing your favourite famous celebration. For me circa 92/93 it was always the Alan Shearer hand in air or two if you got really excited.
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eusebiovic
10:09 Fri Oct 31
Re: Ten Rules of Football as a kid
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Also, the sides of the pitch have no touchline so in theory you could stretch the width of the game into the neighbouring postcode...
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goose
9:58 Fri Oct 31
Re: Ten Rules of Football as a kid
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anyone ever play "up or down"?? basically when you walked along and saw one of those small yellow signs with an 'H' and two numbers - one was at the top (up) the other at the bottom (down).
the number you pick is how many digs in the arm you got.
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Russ of the BML
9:05 Fri Oct 31
Re: Ten Rules of Football as a kid
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*That should be "cut inside and hit a shot" but it summed him up perfectly.
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Russ of the BML
9:04 Fri Oct 31
Re: Ten Rules of Football as a kid
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I recall a game between the kids on our estate and the kids from a nearby estate. It was very tense.
We were playing a game heads and volleys when they all came bowling up. "Fancy a game?" one of their bigger kids asked.
We really didn't want to but you can't show weakness so we took them up. They were much bigger than us but properly under-estimated us. We were all pretty decent.
We launched into an early 3-0 lead so they decided to start kicking lumps out of all of us. Then one of their older brothers came along and made up the one short they were. He was huge and a good player so made it 3-3 near the end. Then he got free out wide, cunt inside and hit a hot which was way, way over the bar and he ran off celebrating shouting "OFF THE BAR AND OVER THE LINE!!!".
Cunt.
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BRANDED
2:16 Fri Oct 31
Re: Ten Rules of Football as a kid
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I dont remember any fat players. Everyone was skinny and skillful. We played with a tenis ball and played skillful passing footy.
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Ashy
1:38 Fri Oct 31
Re: Ten Rules of Football as a kid
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In the winter we couldn't go on the school field at break times so we often played Angles using the end wall of the classroom that was along the edge of the playground.
Each of us took turns to kick the ball against the wall, but only had one touch. You miss you are out.
Loved that game!
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gph
12:48 Fri Oct 31
Re: Ten Rules of Football as a kid
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The length of the pitch is defined by the distance between the goals.
The width of the pitch is theoretically infinite, but practically defined by the school fence
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mongo
12:43 Fri Oct 31
Re: Ten Rules of Football as a kid
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We also used to play 'fouling footy' as a kid. Which basically meant beating each other up while trying to score
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Geoffrey Pike
10:52 Thu Oct 30
Re: Ten Rules of Football as a kid
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In our version you had to take as many raps/scrapes as the card you'd drawn. Unless it was a black ace then it would be 40.
Used to get a bit messy!
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